No Cooking in the Dorms

The options for non-perishable food are limited, restaurants are expensive, and the cafeteria isn’t always open.  I was dying for something nice like a hard boiled egg with some salt and pepper.  I could just buy hardboiled eggs from the gas station, but it’s like $2.00 for three hardboiled eggs.  Not an amount I’m willing to pay.  After weighing my options, I decided to try an experiment that was so unusual and so desperate that only living in a building that doesn’t allow mini-fridges or any cooking devices could force me into it.  I couldn’t even find someone who had tried it on Google, which I guess could mean I’m an innovator, assuming this works.  I wanted to know if you can make hard-boiled eggs in a Thermos.

It’s a simple procedure.  You buy a Thermos, put some eggs in it, and add hot water.  Where do you get hot water without a stove?  From the Culligan machine.  I don’t know the real name of them so that’s what I call them.  They are everywhere.  Every floor of the dormitory, every other floor of every school building, every administrative building, the library, every restaurant and pool hall has ice cold or near-boiling hot water instantly available 24/7.  It’s super nice.  But mostly all you can do with it is make tea or ramen.  Or, I guess, drink the cold water.  So…

An adequate Thermos. $9 USD

Anyway, I got a Thermos and some eggs and I planned out my strategy.  Obviously when I put the eggs into the hot water, they would splash hot water all over, so I put in the eggs before the water.  The eggs would cool the water, so I waited for them to warm up to room temperature before cooking time began.  After 30 minutes in their hot bath, I dumped out the cooled water and added more hot water to the same eggs for another 30 minutes.

How to slide eggs into a Thermos without breaking them.

Seriously, there is still nothing weird about this. It is totally normal and everyone does it. Oh, I'm holding the Thermos like that because I'm using the heel of my left hand to stabilize the camera.

For about 90 minutes of work you get two soft boiled eggs that are done pretty thoroughly.  They are kind of mushy because one burst and got water into it.  I realize that there is no way in heck I am going to wait 90 minutes for two hard boiled eggs on a regular basis, but I imagine that three eggs might make the time invested worth it if it can work.  I decide to go for broke.  This plan is fully ineffective and as gross as it could possibly be.

Three eggs, two changes of water. The water goes from boiling hot to lukewarm very quickly when you add eggs, so increasing the brewing time to 45 minutes doesn't help. But they did have a nice bath, so that's cool.

Wrap-up:  You can make two hard-boiled eggs using hot water from a Culligan machine and a thermos, but only with an excessive amount of work for 35 cents worth of hot food.  Alternately, you can make three slimy, undercooked egg yolks covered in white disease sauce.  Today we learned that not all science experiments work.

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